Exodus 34

6 And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, The Lord, the Lord, the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness,

7 maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellion and sin. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation.

I read these verses and I had trouble reconciling verse 6 with verse 7. I mean, verse 6 says that the Lord is gracious, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, yet verse 7 says that He punishes the children and their children for the sins of the fathers even down to the third and fourth generation. How can these two apparently opposing views be compatible?

I think the thing here is that any sin has consequences. If we rob a bank and are arrested and found guilty, then we go to prison. The crime of bank robbing has the punishment of a prison sentence. If we continually lose our temper, are always shouting at others, then pretty soon they will start trying to avoid us, to stay out of our way for fear of what we might say or do. If we commit adultery and our spouse finds out, it may end in divorce. If we abuse our children, then they may grow up to be child abusers themselves. If we continually put our children down, tell them they are useless and no good, then they may develop a sense of inadequacy, feelings of uselessness and never reach their full potential because they will automatically assume they are going to fail.

Sin has consequences and some of those consequences affect the people around us, our wives, our husbands, our family, our children, even down to the third and fourth generation.

But then I found this reference to Ezekiel 18:

19 Yet you ask, 'Why does the son not share the guilt of his father?' Since the son has done what is just and right and has been careful to keep all my decrees, he will surely live.

20 The soul who sins is the one who will die. The son will not share the guilt of the father, nor will the father share the guilt of the son. The righteousness of the righteous man will be credited to him, and the wickedness of the wicked will be charged against him.

So these verses are expanding Exodus 34. Children who follow in their parents footsteps, who do exactly the same sinful things as their parents, will be punished accordingly. But those who turn to the Lord, who do what is just and right, will surely live. It is a case of God punishing the children if they carry on the sin of their father. So if the child of a mass murderer becomes in turn a mass murderer, then that child will be punished, but if the child decides the life is a serial killer is not for him, then he will not be punished. I know this is a extreme and trivial example, but hopefully you get the gist.

Yet again it is a heart matter. One where we each need to get our hearts right with God. You can't get into heaven because your parents were Christians, you need to be a Christian in your own right, to develop a relationship with God, a walk with Him, to accept Jesus Christ as your Saviour, because it is down to you, not what your parents or friends do.