James 4:3

NIV: When you ask, you do not receive, because you ask with wrong motives, that you may spend what you get on your pleasures

The Message: Because you know you'd be asking for what you have no right to. You're spoiled children, each wanting your own way.

Firstly, James tells us that the quarrels between us are caused by our own desires when we want something we can't have and end up having an argument, starting a war, or whatever to get what we want. Then he tells us the reason we don't have what we want is because we don't ask God, and now, here he is saying that when we do ask God, we ask with all the wrong motives.

Remember the Lord's prayer? Our Father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name, thy kingdom come, thy will be done….. Thy will be done, not mine or yours, but His will, the Father's will. If we have our hearts right with God, if we are truly seeking to follow Him, to do His will, not ours, then it will follow that we will be praying in line with His will anyway. We won't be concentrating on the things we want but we will be focusing on the things of the Kingdom, things that are of God. That doesn't mean to say that we can’t ask for the things we need (food, finances, healing, children, spouses, family, and so on), but when we do ask, we will be asking from the right motives.

Take a look at David. Remember the time when all his men were at war but he stayed at home. Then he just happened to be wandering around on the roof after lunch (obviously bored, or couldn't be bothered doing the things he should have been doing ;) - I have days like that too!), and he took a look over the side of the roof to see Bathsheba taking a bath.

2 Samuel 11:2-4 One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, Isn't this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite? Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. (She had purified herself from her uncleanness.) Then she went back home. (NIV)

David was led astray by his own desires to sleep with Bathsheba and then ended up having her husband killed as he tried to cover up the adultery. He took his eyes off God, and placed them fair and square on the things of this world with disastrous consequences as his son (his and Bathsheba's) died, and there were family problems (to say the least) from thereafter.

In the same way, if we see something we want and try and get it in our own way, that often leads to arguments and quarrels. When we ask God, we are probably asking for all the wrong reasons, because we want what others have, we want to look good, feel good, and not because we are wanting to do God's will, seeking His glory not ours.

What do we want to do? What desires doe we want to fulfil? Are we only seeking to satisfy our own desires or are we really wanting the things God would have us have? Are we just asking in prayer in order to get God's approval for something we are going to go ahead and do anyway regardless?

If so, what do you think might happen if we ask in prayer for God to change our desires so they match His will for our lives? Prayer is a very powerful weapon and tool, and many times, we really don't appreciate what we have at our fingertips. Maybe if we all spent more time on our knees in prayer, asking for the things that are in line with God's will, for ourselves, our family and friends, our countries, , the world would be a much better place.